What's Opera, Arnold?/Lyrics
I'm a Big Ugly Clown Harold :I'm a — I'm a... :Big, ugly clown-o; :A big, sad, ugly clown — ohhhhh... Ruth McCarmen Ruth :I'm Ruth McCarmen, and awfully charmin' — :I guess you noticed by the way you stare; :You're not bad, either — let's take a breather, :And we can talk about my auburn hair! Chorus :Her auburn hair — you're standing there! :Why don't you introduce yourself to Ruth? Stinky :She's like a flower blossom! Sid :I know — she's wicked awesome! Gerald :Come on Arnold, it's the moment of truth! Don Arnold Arnold :My name's Don Arnold...please have a caramel; :Your hair is lovely — do you like my pants? :They're made of satin; the cape's pure Latin — :I had it tailored in the south of France! Chorus :The south of France — your satin pants; :Why don't you ask the lady for a dance? Stinky :It's time for your decision! Sid :It's almost intermission! Gerald :Hey, Arnold — you better ask her to dance! Ride of Brunhelga Helga :Ruth is a lightweight — a giggling geek-bait; :I need to thrash her — that's what I said! :Ruth is a loser! How could you choose her? :How could you do that, football head? Chorus :Football head! Football head! Helga :To show my contempt, her picture I shred! Stinky :Helga's a viking! Sid :Sure is exciting! Helga :I'm gonna thump her right on the head! Arnold :Oh yeah? How? Helga :With my golden magic slingshot! Stinky :Golden magic slingshot? Sid :Golden magic slingshot? Gerald :I thought it was spear and a magic helmet. Helga :No — with my golden magic slingshot! :Doi! Carm Helga Arnold :Ruth?! Helga :Ruth? Hmpfh! :Just like I stated, she's overrated; :A big no-brainer with enormous feet! :Why not forget her? I'm so much better; :My name's Carm Helga and I'm awfully sweet! Chorus :She's awfully sweet — such tiny feet! :Her name's Carm Helga and you two should meet! Helga :Come join my band of gypsies! Chorus :We're touring fifty cities! Helga :With you, my gypsy band will be... Chorus and Helga :Complete! Helga :Perfect! What could possibly be better than this? Curly's Bullfights Chorus girls :Curlemio! It's Curlemio! Curly :Thank you very much! :I'm so fine, the girls know I'm divine; :The thing is, I'm sublime — it's really true, you know; Chorus girls :(Really true, you know.) Curly :Check out my cuspidor! I'm what you're looking for; :Helga, won't you dump this guy and come to my bullfights? Helga :Bullfights, huh? Curly :Bullfights and swordfights, rolling in manure; :Blows to the head, I can endure! :Fighting bulls is all I want in life :Plus I could use a wife, Chorus girls :(Use a wife) Curly :And several pairs of tights in shades of blue; Chorus girls :(sighs with pleasure) :(In shades of blue) Curly :Helga, please say "I Do"! Chorus girls :(I Do!) Carmen Rap Fourth-graders :The opera? What a waste of a good field trip! :Contests of brute strength, wrestling in the mud! :I'm looking for some music to listen to :Curly's the best; :That's right — tastes so good it's right :Arnold's a dud! :Figaro... :Helga, you should really get a clue; :Whatever you say — that's right — what's a Torero? :Curlamillo's for you! :Arnold is last week's news — :He's overdue; :Figaro-ro-ro-ro :Curly's the one...for you! :This is over! See also *Transcript of the episode "What's Opera, Arnold?" Category:What's Opera, Arnold? Category:Lyrics